But the trouble sometimes with people that are too close to you is, that they are too close. They may not be able to see the forest for the trees, they may feel you are being treated unfairly, they may not feel comfortable telling you what it really is that you need to hear. And from another perspective it maybe an issue that although you are not trying to hide it from anyone, you try to shield the family or friends from the situation. And this could be for a variety of reasons.

When I was actively coaching swimmers, my circles of influence was made up in a number of different ways. My day-to-day circle of influence for coaching was made up of the assistant coaches, it included my mentor coach but it also included two friends that were coaches in basketball and it also included my father.Now the roles for each of these were quite different. The assistant coaches knew our team and what we were trying to achieve, our relationship was based on two things honesty being one of them, so they knew I expected them to tell me how it is.

My mentor coach who knew my strengths and weaknesses as a coach and could guide me with that information. My two basketball coach friends both had great skills as coaches, both completely different but skills that complimented each other. Then there was my dad, we argued a lot about a lot of different things. Not in a spiteful way but the consequence of two strong minded people, but the reality was he had a unique manner of being able to bring perspective to everything.

I had another circle of influence that was made up of all coaches. We would get together on a weekly basis and have lunch. Someone was responsible each week to bring a topic of discussion to the table. These days I have another circle of influence for my business that I use for guidance on a wide ranging series of issues. The makeup of this group is a true reflection of my business wide and varied. Then, we get down to the brains trust, a group that we usually speak by phone as we are spread all over the world, we discuss issues, give advice and help to each other but basically we respect each other for who we are and what we have done. After this particular group have spent time together your brain is going at a thousand miles per hour.